Musical Catechism

Image from Family Tree Magazine – Photo Detective

MUSICAL CATECHISM.

1. What is a slur?
Almost any remark which one singer makes about another.

2. What notes require more time than others?
Notes of hand signed by bankrupt debtors.

3. What is beating time?
Singing so fast that time cannot keep up with you.

4. What is a rest?
Going out of the choir to get some refreshment during sermon time.

5. What is singing with the understanding?
Marking time on the floor with the foot.

6. What is a staccato movement?
Leaving the choir in a huff, because one is dissatisfied with the leader’s requirements.

7. What is figured base?
The scribbling usually found on the blank pages of singing books, supposed to  be executed usually during sermon time.

8. What is a swell?
A professor of music who pretends to know everything about the science, while he cannot conceal his ignorance.

9. With what propriety may a clarionet be used as an accompaniment of church music?
With about the same as a tin kettle, beat with a pair of tongs, might be used with an AEolian harp.

10. What is a leg-ato movement?
The escape of Santa Anna at Cerro Gordo.

—Lynn News.

American Freeman (Prairieville, Wisconsin) Apr 5, 1848

Tags: 1848, Humor, Music, Music Humor