George Washington, whose birth we mark by closing up all day,
Was quite a well-known citizen, or so the schoolbooks say.
In all his sixty-seven years he never told a lie,
But George, you know, had never tried to take a hill on high
For Georgie dated back so far
He’d never owned a motor car.
George Washington could not be led into prevarication,
And so, of course, they chose him for the Father of His Nation.
Although he chopped the cherry tree he soon confessed his crime,
For lying was considered wrong, way back in Georgie’s time.
But in that gasless, quaint, old-style age
They never bragged about their mileage.
George Washington bu seldom swore; he rarely used an oath;
He might say “Tut” or even “Pish,” but never, never both.
That brief vocabulary now would hardly take him far,
But Washington was never asked to start a frozen car.
He cried “Git up!” when he would go;
To stop, he merely muttered “Whoa!”
George Washington was fearless, too, on dry land or afloat;
His famous picture proves it, for he stood up in the boat.
He crossed the Delaware that night! Was that just for the ride?
Ah, no, my children, George desired to reach the other side.
No foe could make our hero stop;
He’d never met a traffic cop.
Oakland Tribune (Oakland, California) Feb 18, 1923