Archive for July 18th, 2012

Preparing to Visit the Fair

July 18, 2012

Image from the Mormon Channel – Legacy

Preparing to Visit the Fair.

Say, wife! they tell me’at the fair ‘ll be a corkin’ show,
An’ kinder sort o’ seems ter me as though we orter go,
But, sufferin’ Jerusalem’ the hotel rates’ll be
Too blamed all-fired steep I s’pose, for sech ez you an’ me.
Put on yer thinkin’ cap an’ see ‘f they ain’t nobody there
‘At we kin go an’ visit ‘ith while takin’ in the fair.
It doesn’t matter who they be, jest so they’re kith er kin,
Er some acquaintance, anyone ‘st’s like ter take us in.
It seems ter me ez though ermong our cousins an’ our aunts,
Our nieces an’ our nephews, like they’d orter be’s chance
To rake up some connection, ar at least somebody who
Knows some one’t knows some one, ‘at knows either me or you.
What come of all yer cousin’s folks ‘at moved ter Illinois
Erbout the time we married? Mebby they hav girls an’ boys
A livin’ in Chicago, hunt up their address an’ write
An’ say we long ter see ’em — jest a dyin’ day an’ night.
An’ what erbout the bridewell, ain’t we got no friends in there?
Er mebby in the county jail — it doesn’t matter where.
Ain’t no one in the hospitals ‘at you’d be like ter know?
We’ve got ter scare up someone or we cayn’t take in the show.

— NIXON WATERMAN.

The News (Frederick, Maryland) May 7, 1893

Image from Wikipedia

Little Pets – Big Pets

July 18, 2012

Remember Folks! Little Pets Grow Into Big Pets!

Wage Earner: Cute Little Tyke, What is it?

Salaried Man: It’s a device to nick the wealthy for more taxes!

Farmer: If Uncle wants it, it’s okay with me – I’ll never hafta feed it!

*     *     *     *     *     *     *    *     *

For Instance – Whooda Ever Thought – Way Back in 1913

RICH MAN

POOR MAN

BEGGAR MAN

THIEF

DOCTOR

LAWYER

MERCHANT

CHIEF

*     *     *     *     *     *     *     *     *

C’MON, C’MON EVERYONE!

DIVVY UP!

Dixon Evening Telegraph (Dixon, Illinois) Mar 10, 1954