Posts Tagged ‘Attorney Humor’

Make A Lawyer of Him

July 14, 2010

FIT FOR A LAWYER.

An old lady waked into a lawyer’s office lately, when the following conversation took place:

Lady — Squire, I called to see if you would like to take this boy and make a lawyer of him.

Lawyer — The boy appears rather young, madam — how old is he?

Lady — Seven years, sir.

Lawyer — He is too young, decidedly too young. Have you no boys older?

Lady — O yes, sir. I have several; but we have concluded to make farmers of the others. I told my old man I thought this little fellow would make a first rate lawyer, and so I called to see if you would take him.

Lawyer — No, madam; he is too young yet, to commence the study of the profession. But why do you think this boy any better calculated for a lawyer than your other sons?

Lady — Why, you see, sir, he’s just seven years old to-day. When he was only five, he’d lie like all natur; when he got to be six, he was as sassy and impudent as any critter could be; and now he’ll steal every thing he can lay his hands on!

The Mountain Democrat (Placerville, California) Mar 4, 1854

The Lying Attorney

March 6, 2009

gravestone

EPITAPH ON AN ATTORNEY AT LAW.

Beneath this smooth stone, by the bone of his bone,

Sleeps Master John Gill;

By lies when alive, this attorney did thrive,

And now that he’s dead, he lies still.

Ohio Repository, The (Canton, Ohio) Feb 20, 1817