Posts Tagged ‘Walt Mason’

Sage Counsel – It’s What’s for Christmas

December 23, 2011

SAGE COUNSEL.

The Christmas season comes apace,
when smiles will hang from every face.
The Christmas spirit for a time,
will make our lives a thing sublime.
Alas, beshrew me, and dodgast!
The Christmas spirit does not last!
A day or two it warms our hearts,
then straightway shrivels and departs;
why does it chase itself so soon,
and leave our lives all out of tune?
It is because we eat too much
of turkey, pudding, pies and such;
the Christmas spirit cannot dwell
where people with dyspepsia yell.
The Christmas morning finds us calm;
the season, like a soothing balm,
has healed the broubles and the cares
that man through weary workdays bears.
We look with kind and loving eyes
upon our smiling fellowguys;
we send some peanuts to the poor,
and think the Spirit will endure.
And then we eat a gorgeous meal,
including turkeys, ducks and veal,
and pies — the kinds that mother made —
and doughnuts, cakes and marmalade.
At night our burdened innards balk,
and through long hours the floor we walk;
and in the morning, cold and gray —
the morning after Christmas day —
we groaning leave the sleepless berth,
and care no hoot, for peace on earth.
And now I spring some good advice,
which followed up, will cut much ice.
Eat humble grub on Christmas Day,
and give the gorgeous things away.

Walt Mason

Ogden Standard Examiner (Ogden, Utah) Dec 22, 1920

The Newark Advocate (Newark, Ohio) Dec 23, 1911

The Drinker is the Guilty One

December 9, 2011

Appleton Post Crescent (Appleton, Wisconsin) Nov 21, 1923

RIPPLING RHYMES
By Walt Mason

Responsibility.

Some four and twenty thirsty men
went to an eastern boozing ?en
and lapped up bowls of deadly gin,
and when they stowed the stuff within,
they went off to their divers homes
with no foreboding in their domes
that they would never drink again
in any joint or boozing ken,
that they were bound for kingdom come,
where there is no illicit rum.
But in a few brief hours they all
were dead of poison alcohol.
Men read the story as they chewed
their breakfast prunes and other food,
and said, “The guys who sell such rot
should all be taken out and shot.
The skates who make such liquid doom
should all be hurried to the tomb.”
This is the feeling that prevails
when men peruse such dreadful tales;
the bootleg vendors all should sleep
forever in the donjon keep.
The men who buy the wretched stuff
have suffered punishment enough,
upon their rest we can’t encroach
with admonition and reproach;
but they were much to blame, methinks —
as much as those who sold the drinks.
All men must know that when they buy
and drink the seething gin and rye,
the hocused wine, unhallowed rum,
they are inviting death to come.
They have been warned a million times
against the hooch purveyor’s crimes,
they have been told in terms refined
that they’ll be killed or stricken blind
if they persist in quaffing bowls
of liquor in illegal holes.
If one bootlegger will not sell,
they know another passing well,
they’re bound to have the awful dope
that’s fatal as a hangman’s rope.
And so when all is said and done,
the drinker is the guilty one.

The Lincoln State Journal (Lincoln, Nebraska) Nov 21, 1928

Appleton Post Crescent (Appleton, Wisconsin) Dec 23, 1930

Appleton Post Crescent (Appleton, Wisconsin) Jan 12, 1923

The Boy Stood on the Burning Deck

November 30, 2011

Image from The Battle of the Nile

CASA BY ANCHOR.

BY SLOWCUS.

The boy stood on the burning deck,
There isn’t any doubt;
And yet who saw him on the wreck?
Who really heard him shout?

Would he have stood and roasted there
With jolly-boats so near,
And bragged about his fierce despair
Nor walked off on his ear?

Why not give one good roar for oars
Assail his pa for sail
To wait him toward the fishing shores?
Why stay aboard and wail?

What wonder standing there he seemed
So beautiful and bright?
Who couldn’t while around him beamed
That lovely Titian light?

His pow-wow with his father I
Regard as tempting fate;
If he declined to early die,
Why stay there and dilate?

“Pa, can’t you speak — a little please?
Just try a sneeze or cough,
My nearest kin, kin you release,
Or are you, father, off?”

And while his father slept below
The boy, he never stirred;
One of a “race” who never “go”
Unless they “get the word.”

He called aloud, “Am I allowed
Your leave to leave? Your son
Stands fire, you now, but don’t you crowd
The thing; I’m toasted done.

“Of course I’ll do what you desire,
If you’re laid on the shelf;
I burn with ardor — but, this fire!
You know how ’tis yourself.

“Speak father, I would be released?
I list your loving tones,”
He knew not that he pa, deceased,
Had gone to Davy Jones.

Upon his brow he felt the heat,
Yet stood serene and calm.
With only now and then a bleat,
Like Mary’s little lamb.

The yards and spars did burn and snap
All in the wildest way;
Not e’en a shroud was left the chap,
And he the only stay.

There came a bursting thunder peal —
Good gracious! Pretty soon
Boy, ship, and anchor, flag and keel,
Went up in a balloon.

And when this sound burst o’er the tide,
The boy! oh, where was he?
Ask of the winds, or none beside
Stayed long enough to see.

With mast and helm and pennon fair,
That acted well enough,
The sickest thing that perished there
Was that young sailor muff.

Now, boys, don’t take a cent of stock
In Cas-a-bi-an-ca;
The spots from such a son they’d knock,
Our Young A-mer-i-ca.

Cambridge City Tribune (Cambridge City, Indiana) Oct 26, 1871

Image from 80 Plus – an octogenarian’s blog

*****

The original poem, from the All Poetry website:

Casabianca

The boy stood on the burning deck
Whence all but he had fled;
The flame that lit the battle’s wreck
Shone round him o’er the dead.

Yet beautiful and bright he stood,
As born to rule the storm;
A creature of heroic blood,
A proud, though childlike form.

The flames roll’d on…he would not go
Without his father’s word;
That father, faint in death below,
His voice no longer heard.

He call’d aloud…”Say, father,say
If yet my task is done!”
He knew not that the chieftain lay
Unconscious of his son.

“Speak, father!” once again he cried
“If I may yet be gone!”
And but the booming shots replied,
And fast the flames roll’d on.

Upon his brow he felt their breath,
And in his waving hair,
And looked from that lone post of death,
In still yet brave despair;

And shouted but one more aloud,
“My father, must I stay?”
While o’er him fast, through sail and shroud
The wreathing fires made way,

They wrapt the ship in splendour wild,
They caught the flag on high,
And stream’d above the gallant child,
Like banners in the sky.

There came a burst of thunder sound…
The boy-oh! where was he?
Ask of the winds that far around
With fragments strewed the sea.

With mast, and helm, and pennon fair,
That well had borne their part;
But the noblest thing which perished there
Was that young faithful heart.

By Felicia Dorothea Hemans, © 1809, All rights reserved.

Editor notes

Casabianca, It tells the story of Giocante Casabianca, a 12-year old boy, who was the son of Luce Julien Joseph Casabianca. Casabianca was the commander of Admiral de Brueys’ flagship, l’Orient , Giocante Casabianca stayed at his post aboard the flagship L’Orient during the Battle of the Nile. Giocante Casabianca and his father both died in an explosion when the fire reached the gunpowder store.

The Atlanta Constitution (Atlanta, Georgia) Jul 21, 1894

*****

Evidently, this was a popular poem to parody – From The Guardian

“Casabianca” was soon taken up by the parodists. As we’ve recently discussed on this forum, a good parody demands such close reading it might almost be thought an ironical act of love. But most of the anonymous parodists of “Casabianca” didn’t get beyond the first verse. “The boy stood on the burning deck./ His feet were covered in blisters./ He’d burnt the socks right off his feet/ And had to wear his sister’s” was the version I heard as a child.

A few more:

The Atlanta Constitution (Atlanta, Georgia) Jun 24, 1895

The Atlanta Constitution (Atlanta, Georgia) Feb 2, 1913

Syracuse Herald (Syracuse, New York) Sep 25, 1920

Syracuse Herald (Syracuse, New York) Jul 7, 1912

CASABIANCA.

THE BOY stood on the burning deck — an orator was he,
and in that scene of fire and wreck he spoke quite fluently,
“The men who hold the public scaps should all be fired,” he cried;
“they should make room for worthy chaps who wait their turn outside.
True virtue always stands without, and vainly yearns and tolls,
while wickedness in office shouts, and passes round the spoils.
One rule should govern our fair land — a rule that’s bound to win
all office holders should be canned, to let some new ones in.
All people usefully employed at forge, in mill or shop,
should know that labor’s null and void — man’s duty is to yawp.
The farmer should forsake his play, the harness man his straps;
the blacksmith should get busy now, and look around for snaps.
Why should the carpenter perform, when we have homes enough;
why should producers round us swarm, when statesmen are the stuff?
Why should we put up ice or hay, or deal in clothes or meat,
when politicians point the way that leads to Easy street?”
There came a burst of thunder sound; the boy — O where was he?
Ask of the winds that all around with lungs bestrewed the sea.

Walt Mason

Syracuse Herald (Syracuse, New York) Jun 14, 1911

THE SPENDING SPREE

The boy stood on the burning deck and soaked his aching head;
he wrote a million dollar check, then cheerily he said:
“My friends, I’ve never made a move one honest cent to earn,
but here’s where I start out to prove that I have wealth to burn.”
They called aloud, he would not go; heroic were his words:
“I’ve still got money left to throw at insects and at birds.”
And calmly midst the awful wreck while billows played wild games
he wrote another million check and fed it to the flames.
You say if you had such a boy you’d bend him o’er your knee,
and many shingles you’d deploy to curb his spending spree;
and yet you’re strutting ’round the deck as lordly as a jay
and spending money by the peck and throwing it away.
It seems that men cannot withstand the siren lure of debt;
the things their appetites demand they buy, already yet.
When times of stress and panic come they’ll utter naughty words
and wish they had the goodly sum they pelted at the birds.

CLEM BRADSHAW.

Reno Evening Gazette (Reno, Nevada) May 31, 1920